Just when I start feeling good about myself, I figure out something else to wonder and worry about. I got into training because I wanted to work with high school athletes. It’s nothing against the adults I trained, I loved all of them. But, it wasn’t what drew me to training. I wanted to help kids and I wanted to be around sports. But, I had no athletes and there were no leads in sight.
I know I work with mostly youth athletes now, but the idea of youth training didn’t cross my mind at the time. I was working in a gym where the youngest people there were in high school. Instagram and social media wasn’t what it is now, so I didn’t really know of anybody that was doing youth training.
I finally got my break in 2015, but it came with a caveat. I hated selling, but you better believe I put on my best salesman work when Joe Desilvio and Luke Santore came in. I sold to them like my life depended on it and I was able to land them both. Unfortunately, they told me ahead of time they wanted to do one contract’s worth of training. Joe had baseball coming up and his summer was swamped and Luke just wanted to get started so then he could go off and train on his own. They were upfront about it and they gave me a chance, all I could ask for.
Not what I wanted to hear, but beggars can’t be choosers and I was determined to give them the best experience they could get. Joe was a baseball player at Monsignor Farrell High School, where I played growing up, so he was everything I was looking for. I was excited landing him as a client because I always wanted to work with high school baseball players and I got the opportunity to break out some of the baseball and athletic training exercises and drills I’ve been reading about. I didn’t have him for long, but the good news was he wound up making the varsity team and then, two years later, continued playing baseball at John Jay College.
Joe I had a couple of months, but the 15-year-old Luke and his dad gave me a year. Luke wasn’t on any teams, but definitely could have been a football player. I thought we were going to have to take things slow, but he was a gym rat by day one. Over time, I gave him stuff to do on his own and I’d see him every week getting after it. The year was awesome and his lifts went through the roof. On his last session, he deadlifted 345 pounds and was close to bench pressing 225 pounds. I knew he would be good on his own, but man it was hard letting him go knowing what could have been if I had another year. I still see him at the gym and he’s a monster.
So far, things were looking pretty good. But, the trajectory shifted and it had me questioning myself. Luke and Joe were awesome, but they were soon gone. Camille was doing amazing work, but she was moving. Jess was flipping tires, box squatting and pushing sleds, but she moved, too. I was losing people. And, while it was for circumstances out of my control, it hurt. These were people that helped me grow up in this business and losing them never crossed my mind (except for the boys, I knew I only had them for one contract). I’d pick up people here and there, but they’d either do the three-session trial or sign up for a month and then be gone.
The doubts start creeping in again. How am I going to sell myself to more people? I thought I was starting to get passed that. Then, I’m looking at myself in the mirror and wondering if I’d ever actually get myself in any real shape. How could I be a trainer if I can’t even get myself in better shape? The doubts were coming out of the woodworks.
For the past couple of years, I’d been following Joe DeFranco and running his training programs for myself. He came out with a podcast in 2014 and made an announcement in March that he was coming out with a new program. His “Westside for Skinny Bastards” program was his main online program that he was known for and he was coming out with the upgraded version called SB911. If you were a part of his Insider group, which I was, you’d get to test out the program and be a part of a transformation contest.
I’ve never really made a transformation in my own training before, but was willing to go out given the stakes. I didn’t care about winning, I just cared about placing in the top 3 because that would give you a one-hour consultation with Joe D. and Jim “Smitty” Smith. I felt like it was perfect timing because I needed a kick in my training and would be going to Las Vegas for the first time over the summer, where I’d have to take my shirt off to go into the pools.
I figured it was put up or shut up time. If I’m really as upset as I claim to be and want to do all these things as a coach, well here’s my chance to take a stand. I’ve written and talked about it so much, so I’ll just save you some time and tell you I won. I talked about winning the contest on my site here.
Making that much progress, getting compliments from people and finding out I won gave me a huge boost in confidence. I thought maybe I actually can do something now that I’ve shown that I could actually get myself in shape. This contest opened up the door to me traveling to seminars.
I’ve heard so many coaches that I followed online talk about what they’ve learned from going to seminars across the country and interacting with different coaches. For the longest time, I had no idea where to even look for these events. I developed a small online friendship with Joe D. through the contest, so I finally got the courage in late August during one of his Q & A’s to ask him if he would be presenting anywhere.
That’s when he brought up the SWIS Symposium. He said it was up in Toronto in November and it was one of the best seminars that was out there. If you were going to go to any seminars, this would be the one to go to. He said the things you’ll learn there will blow you away. After going to SWIS every year since, I can tell you it’s the best run seminar there is. I’ve never flown anywhere solo before. It was costly and I wasn’t making much money, so I did have a conversation with my mom about whether or not it was worth it. I was leaning towards doing it and she pushed me towards booking it. She became a fan of Joe which helped.
At the time, I had no idea that I was going to be making a trip that would change the entire course of my training career. And I wouldn’t have any idea of that for a few months after the fact. The trip to Toronto started off with a bang because I met up with Dr. Tom Bilella, who most know as Dr. Tom. Dr. Tom came up to me when we landed because he saw I was wearing a DeFranco hoodie and introduced himself and offered to pay for a cab to the hotel. Dr. Tom was speaking at SWIS and worked closely with Joe D. for a lot of years. Here I was, a nobody in a sea of some of the best coaches in the world, and Dr. Tom made sure I was comfortable. He was an awesome man and actually worked with my mom, my aunt and me on nutrition and taught us a whole lot.
SWIS was part inspirational and part disheartening. Seeing all of these high-end presentations opened my eyes to what is truly out there in the training world. I saw there are so many things out there that the average person couldn’t comprehend. It made me want to get to that level. While that was good, it was also quite humbling. It showed me how little I know. I didn’t really know where to go for certain time slots, I was mostly there for Joe D’s presentation, and wound up sitting in presentations where I had no clue what was being said. The stuff was going right over my head and it had me wondering if I’d ever be able to learn and apply even a fraction of the things being discussed. This was a conference was so high level that you could be in a presentation where the attendees are more distinguished than some of the presenters.
I’m just sitting there listening to stories about these guys training and treating all sorts of pro athletes, Olympians and teams and their state-of-the-art facilities and equipment. These guys have all these stories and I’m making $10-to-$15 an hour training out of a commercial gym. I was the small fish in a very large pond. I did take some pictures and talk to some people, but the imposter syndrome was kicking in. I did not feel like I belonged.
On the last day, I ran into Justin Kavanaugh and Dylan Seeley. Both of them could see that I was the odd man out, but came up and talked to me. Justin bet Dylan that I wouldn’t email him and connect with him. I’m a terrible salesperson and not good at being social in crowds where I don’t know anybody, but I am good at getting back to people after connecting. That was one thing I learned from working in sports media.
The first thing I did when I got home was send Justin an email. I didn’t know much about him and I didn’t know if he would ever get back to me. He never responded to my email, which anyone who knows Justin will laugh about, but he did friend me on Facebook in December.
I had no idea if anything would come of that email. I just went about my days wondering where I would go as a coach. I would find out the implications of that email the next year.